Wednesday, August 30, 2006

-ranting away..-

Today's forcast:"You are soon goign to change your line of work"

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-happened again!!!!!-

Its a Wednesday and i am already hysterical. Two more days for the weekend..yaaay....havent been sleeping well from quite sometime now .Bad dreams, claustrophobic at times, weird thoughts, sense of loosing someone the minute i close my eyes.....all sorts of things on my head. I guess i should calm down....so i keep telling myself that.

Today managed to stay back at home even though i am feeling miserable about that fact that i did not go to work considering there was shit loads of things to take care off...but what the hell????

Lately have been going out at night with a crazy bunch of friends just driving around, having tea at a small roadside shop…..( by now the shopkeeper knows ur names and also out pet names. so u can imagine)..These late night drives have been keeping me awake...Driving at a speed of 124-140 kms on the ring road and blasting snoop-dogg followed by some house music…..actually for a temporary period of time eases my head....
Another confession.....Had quit smoking up some 3 years back...hell yeah....i am the been there done that type...but had quit the very day I stepped into this city and proudly enough i say that hadnt touched it till these crazy drives began....
it was probably a Tuesday night.2 weeks back...the boys were running out on the "stuff"…..so we all agreed that we shall go and buy some more. I was excited coz i wanted to see how they do it here….. So i got myself comfortable in the car, while Mr. Moo drove at a speed wherein if i wouldnt have been sitting in between the other two crazy mutts…..surely would have flown out of the window...

I realized we were slowing down and Mr. Moo now drove at a speed wherein a turtle and i literally mean it...…..a turtle could put us to shame....Neways...We drove slowly next to the kerb and Mr. Moo was advised by all never to apply brakes but keep driving at this annoyingly slow pace….he honked once outside a small tent next to the kerb on the pavement….nothing...we drove a little further and took a U-turn and drove back at the same pace in front of the tent….Honked again...Nothing....
Geez…..we did this about 7 times and i was getting irritated..(Considering i suffer from absolute impatience in everything i am involved in)..doing this 7 times had got me rattling off in Hindi to the bunch....Suddenly i was asked to shut up!!!..
Shut up.....Who the F@$* said that...neways…..i gave up.....a small lil man, sleepy but neatly dressed in trousers and tucked in shirt walked up to the car...Mr. King held out a bunch of bills out of his window and said" 100"
I was watching all this with fascination coz there were cops patrolling those streets all the time and the boys were pro…
Mr.King grabbed the small lil packet from the small man's hand and we zoomed off...
The next question? Who is gonna roll it...the entire bunch turned their faces out of the window and nobody seemed to want to do it…..just then Mr. Moo teased me by asking me to roll it…..and i agreed..
I cleaned it, mixed it…..rolled it...( realized i am still good at it)

And the first one was lit….by now i wanted to taste it once….just once…..it’s been such a long time...just one....and as i held it between my fingers and the smoke rolled out of my mouth..
I felt…..i felt....nothing...
We all got comfortable in the car, Mr.Moo driving steadily, the joint kept passing and the music kept playing.....

Currently feeling: High

Listening to:when i'm gone....( http://www.bolt.com/douglas-lee/video/2130901 )

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| This angel fell @ 9:27 PM |

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-couldnt be more apt for me right now!!!!-

So lately, I've been wonderin Who will be there to take my place When I'm gone, you'll need love To light the shadows on your face
If a great wave should fall It would fall upon us all And between the sand and stone Could you make it on your own
If I could, then I would I'll go wherever you will go Way up high or down low I'll go wherever you will go
And maybe, I'll find out The way to make it back someday To watch you, to guide you Through the darkest of your days
If a great wave should fall It would fall upon us all Well I hope there's someone out there Who can bring me back to you
Runaway with my heart Runaway with my hope Runaway with my love I know now, just quite how My life and love might still go on In your heart and your mind I'll stay with you for all of time
If I could turn back time I'll go wherever you will go If I could make you mine I'll go wherever you will go

Currently feeling: Loved

Listening to:The lyrics are above.....

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| This angel fell @ 6:24 PM |

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Tuesday, August 29, 2006

-My few favorite phrases from movies..-

1. We live in a cynical world. A cynical world. And we work in a business of tough competitors. I love you. You... complete me...( Jerry Maguire)

2. I love him for the way he is, i love him for the man he almost is...I love him, i love him, i love him, i love him, i love him.... ...( Jerry Maguire)

3. She smokes like a chimney, drinks like a fish and dresses like her mother! ....(Bridget Jones diary)

4. My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.......(Gladiator)

5. Captain Steven Hiller: I ain't heard no fat lady!
David Levinson: Forget the fat lady. You're Obsessed with fat lady. Just get us out of here! .....(Independance day)

6. Elvis has left the building!!!........( Independance day)

7.Maverick, you just did an incredibly brave thing. What you should have done was land your plane! you don't own that plane, the tax payers do! Son, your ego is writing checks your body can't cash. You've been busted, you lost your qualifications as section leader three times, put in hack twice by me, with a history of high speed passes over five air control towers, and one admiral's daughter! ........(Top gun)

8.It's classified. I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you...(Top gun)

Currently feeling: jobless

Listening to: my sacrifice....

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| This angel fell @ 2:56 PM |

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Friday, August 25, 2006

-at work...-

This one took bout 7 mins.....sitting at office..getting bored....desperately wanted to take my mind off a few things.....sincerely speaking......it helped...

Currently feeling: Bored

Listening to: sutta na mila....

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| This angel fell @ 6:45 PM |

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-My first......after a very long time-

Its been a long time.....i sketched.....not one of my good ones.....
(P.S:..I have a fetish with hands...I dont remember telling you so!!!!!)

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| This angel fell @ 6:26 PM |

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Thursday, August 24, 2006

-Devil.....-

He is so young, so naive- he is a prisoner of my world
Step into my darkened chamber- evil will unfurl
Chew em up, spit em out-thats what i am about
Do what i want-if you dont like it then get the fuck out

I wont hurt you, just come closer-step into my privatre room
You cant resist warm delights-step into my private world

Dream about me and worship me- and maybe if you do
Maybe i will come and see you- just to watch you drool
Stupid boy cant you see i dont give a damn
If you live or if you die- just dont waste my time
I wont hurt you!!!There is no escape

Come into my arms and then you will know
Just what i want you for
Ill take your pride, ill take your life
And now you are back for more
I wont hurt you precious!!!

Currently feeling: Violent

Listening to: I fucking hate you.....

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| This angel fell @ 10:00 PM |

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Tuesday, August 22, 2006

-candle freak!!!-

I have a obsession wid candles...only my closest of the close friends know bout it...and you too.....
so here are few of thm and wht they stand for..

Red
Love, passion, energy, enthusiasm, courage, strength, radiant health. Also good for protection against psychic attack, physical harm inflicted through Black Magic performed by enemies, and to conquer fear of laziness.
Orange
Symbolizes the Sun of midsummer. A color of great power. Enthusiasm, fun, vitality, stimulation, adaptability, attraction and friendship. Use for bringing success, or to draw/attract good things and friendly people.
Yellow
Clairvoyance, learning, mind and communication. Used in operations designed to bend the mind of another. Also to aid memory, healing, improve business, success in the performing arts, promote cheerfulness in a grouchy person, chasing evil, and exorcism.
Green
Symbolizes nature and material gain. Healing, money, prosperity, luck, fertility, promote balance and harmony in an off balance situation, protection and calming. Other uses - For any circumstance requiring a healthier outlook, or a repeated or renewal of a spell in order to perpetuate it, or protect it from deterioration.
Blue
Healing, meditation, tranquillity and forgiveness. Use light blue for: devotion, inspiration, peace and blessings in the home, to keep a man or woman faithful. Use deep blue for: loyalty on a communal level, successful group enterprise and expansion.
Purple
Intuition, dignity and spiritual shield, wisdom, idealism, psychic manifestation and spirit contact, spirituality, wisdom and psychic awareness. Typically used when great spiritual power is necessary. Effectively used against Black Magick, demoniac possession (to drive away evil), to breakup a jinxed condition, and for spiritual or psychic healing, or to throw up a veil of spiritual protection.
White
Protection, peace, sincerity, virtue of kinds, the highest spirituality, purity and truth. The balanced presence of all colors in synthesis.
Pink
Emotional love, friendships, gentleness, spiritual fulfillment, affection and harmony. Use for spiritual healings, break up bad prevailing conditions of many kinds, great joy and sensual pleasure.
Turquoise
Awareness, meditation, moon and creativity.
Black
Absorption and destruction of negative energy. Represents the still of the night, the deep cold and tranquil waters, the deepest recesses of the unconscious mind. Good for banishing rituals. As a black candle burns it releases whatever energies you have placed into it, when you charged it.
Gold
Symbolizes universal fraternity, great fortune. Use to promote understanding for divinitory rituals and bring about peace in a community in a group. Also used to bring fast luck.
Brown
Color of the soil. Use in times of financial crises to attract money and financial success. Also used to attract the Earth Spirits, who must always be remunerated for their aid, and properly dismissed with a special ritual.
Silver (Light Gray)
Represents stability and neutrality. Use to remove evil influences, or to neutralize any existing undesirable vibrations. Use with meditation to aid the development of psychic developments and ESP. Use as Altar candles to invoke the assistance of the Great Mother, or Goddess aspect of a Deity.
Magenta
This is a difficult color candle to find. Magenta is a illusionary oscillation of the color spectrum, between the infra-red and ultra-violet at a very high frequency. It is named for the ´Magi´ and literally means Magic Color. Used with other candles it will promote a speedy result or action. Also good to use for spiritual healings, exorcisms and quick changes of a favorable nature.

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| This angel fell @ 5:46 PM |

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Thursday, August 17, 2006

-Someday....maybe..-

He was lying down next to me.So close.It was chilly outside and the late night drive had had exhausted me to the bones.I walked in and i saw him lying on the couch changing channels.Was not sure what was he watching.He raised his head , tilted it to his right side and smiled.The smile that gives me the courage to go on.To keep pushing and moving ahead.To wait for another day to begin.At that split second i knew i could take on the whole world.I decided to change into this green t-shirt of mine-quite old one but still manages to cover me up adequately.And i snuggled up on the bed with my quilt.All of a sudden i felt his left hand pull me towards him.And i realised resisting wouldnt be of much use.So i gave in and we just lay there.None of us were talking.Just floating around in our quietus.I was almost drifting into sleep when i felt him running his hands through my hair and i heard myself say " stop smelling my hair"....All i heard was ..nothing...but i knw he had that life saving smile on his face.He gently moved the strands of hair from my neck and placed a kiss just too perfect.This is how i got my first kiss of the day.And fell in love all over again.........
Someday this would come true....Someday....

Currently feeling: Lost

Listening to: With arms wide open.....

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| This angel fell @ 2:03 PM |

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Tuesday, August 15, 2006

-I am fallen......-

I have no soul
I have no heart
I am cast away from heaven
And Im waiting to play my part

To break, to burn, to kiss and to run
nevr to undo wht already is done
untill death will I make you yearn
That is a promise- i have earned...
( incomplete)

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| This angel fell @ 12:00 PM |

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-I really like this one...-

Indeed, indeed, I cannot tell,
Though I ponder on it well,
Which were easier to state,
All my love or all my hate.
Surely, surely, thou wilt trust me
When I say thou dost disgust me.
O, I hate thee with a hate
That would fain annihilate;
Yet sometimes against my will,
My dear friend, I love thee still.
It were treason to our love,
And a sin to God above,
One iota to abate
Of a pure impartial hate

-H.D.Thoreau

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| This angel fell @ 12:22 AM |

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-Gin (personally not my kinda drink)-

Don't tell my mother im living in sin
Don't let the old folks know
Don't tell my twin that I breakfast on Gin
He'd never survive the blow!!!

-Sir Alan Herbert

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| This angel fell @ 12:18 AM |

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-Pain running high....-

Why do we live this life
With all this pain inside
Screaming inside my head
To let go of all those dead
I wish to, I wish i could
But this pain is my aphrodisiac....


Currently feeling: Hurt

Listening to: Hero....

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| This angel fell @ 12:07 AM |

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Monday, August 14, 2006

-never a man...ever...-

If you want someone who will do anything to please you, get a dog.If you want someone who will bring you the newspaper without tearing through it first for the sports page,get a dog.If you want someone who'll make a total fool of himself because he's so glad to see you, get a dog.If you want someone who eats whatever you put in front of him and never says his mother made it better, get adog.If you want someone who's always eager to go out anytime you ask and anywhere you want to go, get a dog.If you want someone who can scare away burglars without waving a lethal weapon around, endangering you and all the neighbors, get a dog.If you want someone who never touches the remote,couldn't care less about Monday Night Football, and watches dramatic movies with you as long as you want,get a dog.If you want someone who'll be content just to snuggle up and keep you warm in bed, and who you can kick out of bed if he slobbers and snores, get a dog.If you want someone who never criticizes anything you do, doesn't care how good or bad you look, acts as though every word you say is worth hearing, never complains, and loves you unconditionally all the time,get a dog!

On the other hand...If you want someone who never comes when you call him,totally ignores you when you walk in the room, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, prowls around all night and come home only to eat and sleep all day, and acts as though you are there only to see that HE's happy.............................Get a CAT

P.S: its a forward..but i thought it's worth trying...

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| This angel fell @ 2:36 PM |

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Saturday, August 12, 2006

-Most of them say this is me...-

At my darkest moments, i feel frustrated.At work and school, i do best when i'm organizing.When i love someone, i tend to worry about them.I was a excellent cook in my past life.In friendship, i am emotional and sympathetic.i will leave a mark on the world with organizational leadership, maybe as the author of self-help books....And i say..This is non-sense...

So this is what i am , from the one who knows me; is a part of me:

The walls keep closing in, its harder to stop the pain and the screams
The voices in my head just get louder, stories of hurt, betrayal and shattered dreams
Cant hold it in much longer, it may be time to unleash the Beast.

Tear it all down, abandon all hope Ye who enter here
Enter the lair of the Beast, My world where happiness has not a prayer
Now I write my own rules, its time to unleash the Beast

Step into my world , where caring hands slash at my heart
Where the shade that nurtures, terrifies and bears my demons in the dark
Where tired legs, cant stop , for the Beast is unleashed.

Now the shadows are my home, and pain is my mistress
Where my salvation is in death and the Grims sweet caress
I am the Beast and I am unleashed.

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| This angel fell @ 3:08 PM |

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Tuesday, August 08, 2006

-The gates of hell.....-

Per me si va ne la citta dolente,
Per me si va ne l'etterno dolore,
Per me si va tra la Perduta Gente.
Giustizia mosse il mio Alto Fattore;
Fecemi la Divina Podestate,
La Somma Sapienza e 'l Primo Amore.
Dinanzi a me non fuor cose create
Se non etterne, e io etterno duro
Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate

-Dante Alighiri( La Divina Commedia, Canto III 1-9)

Through me the road to the city of desolation,
Through me the road to sorrows diuturnal,
Through me the road among the lost creation.
Justice moved my great maker;God eternal
Wrought me: the power, and the unsearchably
High wisdom, and the primal love supernal.
Nothing ere I was made to be
Save things eternal, and I eterne abide;
Lay down all hope, you that go in by me.

Through me the way into the suffering city
Through me the way into the eternal pain
Through me the way through the lost people
Justice moved my high artificer
My maker was divine authority
The highest wisdom, and the primal love.
Before me nothing was created
That was not eternal, and I endure eternally.
Abandon all hope, you who enter!

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| This angel fell @ 12:35 PM |

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--

Dated: 20th July 2006

Message: I have no doubt in my mind that you can keep your word.Here's to a day of fresh air.Lots of love.Teddy

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| This angel fell @ 12:03 PM |

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Monday, August 07, 2006

-Too many..too soon....-

Feeling very restless. I know i am going to ponder and think. I am trying to restrain myself from doing so though i know myself within. I loose my self restrain and i know the depression will eventually set in.I can feel the thoughts gently but steadily floating in my head. I want to think about something else. Something nice. Something beautiful. [I walk up to my cupboard and my gaze stops at the picture]
Staring at the white screen in front of me. It’s been a while now. How do i start? What do i write? I write about you.
I am trying to convene those numerous random thoughts in my head. Too many, too soon, too fast.
My fingers are paining from the constant typing. I don’t look at the screen even once. I know i have made mistakes. I know i am speaking out as never before. After about an hour it stops.. The thoughts...
Now they are more descriptive. More explanatory. They are giving me more time to elaborately think
I am just a herald....

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| This angel fell @ 2:21 PM |

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Saturday, August 05, 2006

-I can say how it feels....-

BEING TWENTY - SOMETHING

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."
It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like.You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two,but then get scared because you barely know whereyou are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold,catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then thenext, secure.You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life,but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away,and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better.Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person.One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.You go through the same emotions and questions over and over,and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the racewould be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out....maybe this will help someone feel like they aren't alone in their state of confusion...

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| This angel fell @ 5:16 PM |

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Friday, August 04, 2006

-questions??-

I refrain from the past
To seek a bright future
I see the agony and the pain
The stretch of the hurt
I know i must
I know i should

Alas, I bereave my emotions,
Subdue my heart
Wipe my tears
And hope against hope
Thought this was just a dream
My misery,
How could this happen to me
How could I let this go on?

My only hope
Someone, oh someone
Take me away from here
I cannot bear this anymore
Where is my knight in shining armor.
No one but myself can do what i must,
Though I must hate myself and despise me,
But what did I do...

I cut my heart into two, someone please help me find it...

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| This angel fell @ 5:14 PM |

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Thursday, August 03, 2006

-I still......-

I watch the western sky the sun is sinking
Before i could realise it got me thinking
I did not miss u much i did not suffer
What did not kill me just made me tougher

I feel the summer goes its fiery sinews
Now in the starry night the case continues
Another night in the court the same old trial
The same old questions asked the same denial
The shadows close around me like jury members
I look for answers in fires embers
Would i be missing you for the rest of the years?
I give my usual line i dont remember

Another summer will come with fiery fingers creep
Into these bones of mine these memories will never sleep
With all the differences we keep our distances
Why should it follow?
How much i loved you to let you go?

What is the force that binds the stars?
I wear this mask to hide my scars
What is the power that pulls the tide?
Never could find a place to hide
What moves the earth around the sun?
What else can i do but run and run?

Afraid to love, afraid to fail
Like a mast without a sail
The moon becomes a fingers nail and slowly is sinking
Another day begins and still i am thinking
That this indifference of yours, was my invention
When everything i did, caught your attention

You were my compass star you were my measure
You were my pirates map of buried treasure
If this was all correct, the last thing i would expect
The prosecution might just rest and its time to confess

I still love you
I still love you....

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| This angel fell @ 5:13 PM |

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Tuesday, August 01, 2006

-Angel....-

Every night I slept with the demons of wrath and pain,
My eyes would tell a story, but nobody would listen to what I’m saying

Beaten down to the ground, I lay bloodied among the ruins of a dream
Trapped inside the recesses of my mind, lost in the echoes of a scream

Till one day, I closed my eyes and said, I shall hurt no more
Letting go was the easiest thing to do, like a boat drifting away from the shore

Then through the haze of pain, came a voice that was sweet and clear
A voice reminding me of love, a voice that stroked my heart and called me near

Pulling me back from the abyss, you wiped away years of scars
You said a lot, yet said nothing, never promising me the moon and the stars

You talked of a love that would make me rage and cry
But you gave me life and hope and the will to try

Like the breaking of sunrise from the top of a tree
You showed me a path, you let me loose, you set me free

You are my angel, my nightingale during a dark night, my guiding light
I may lay cut and bleeding today, but i shall never fall, but stand and fight

You gave me a reason to live, the hope o wake up and the strength to go on
You’re the reality i have been waiting for, every minute for oh so long.

Someday i hope you understand what you mean to me,
With my last dying breath I’ll make u smile, someday you’ll see.

Currently feeling: Missed

Listening to: Heartache....

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| This angel fell @ 5:04 PM |

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-The day i lost my dogs and found my kids...-

Monday’s are a bitch, was the thought in my mind as I headed to work. With the Monday blues in my head and i hated every minute of the journey. Something within me told me its going to be a long day and a tough one too.
I had just settled down at my desk and i realized that i haven’t fed my dogs. So i called Sarita (my bestest of friend in this city) and i asked her to feed them.( Them being Simba and Liz)
Hours passed and it was around 1330 hrs. I hear my cell phone ringing and i jump across a huge rack of papers (that i am yet to sort out) to reach for me phone. Sarita is calling. Maybe to tell me that she will reach home a little late. Maybe to tell me that she has already fed the dogs. Maybe to tell me that they have chewed up the house again. Maybe to tell me that they have dirtied the patio. Maybe to tell me the maid has not turned up. Maybe...
I pick up the phone. And all i can make out is some mumbling. I try to form sentences out of those ruffled words and I realize she was saying" Both are missing, both are missing".
It did not strike me that she was talking bout Simba and Liz. How can they be missing. The last thing i realized was that i was mumbling myself. I grabbed my purse and started running towards the road where i could get a Rick.
As I reached my block i saw Sarita walking down the lane looking around. That was when reality struck me. They are indeed missing. Both of them. The neighbors told us that some salesmen around 12 visited the house in the afternoon. My heart sank as they told me that they heard them barking even then. But someone took them away on a 2 wheeler. The thought of never seeing them ever was bedded in my head by then.
By this time i was running toward the house thinking they might have been on the terrace or got locked up in one of the rest rooms. Sarita must have forgotten to check. As I ran into the house i saw their chew dolls lying around and like a flash i went back in time. Liz would never leave her chew doll even for a split second. She wouldn’t have let go of it even while she is in bed. I was used to seeing her with it in her mouth 27 par 7.
I rushed into the house only to find that it was empty. Before i could realize Sarita was asking me to calm down. Later it came to my knowledge that I was hysterically screaming out their names and crying at the same time. Little did i know that the worst is yet to come.
Next thing i know i was running on the lanes, by lanes around my house bare feet and screaming their names out again and again. My worry was for the elder one (that being Simba) he is the more scared and lost types. And somewhere inside my mind I consoled myself that Liz (being a Lab) would try to find her way back home. But Simba, my poor little boy, God please help him (I am an atheist by the way). I turned to look around and i saw Sarita on her bike following me and so i stopped running. She suggested we go on the bike looking for them. I also agreed to the idea as i was nearly fainting from the exhaustion that lasted for an hour by now. I already had my neighbors fanning out in all directions to look for both of them.
As we drove we searched both sides of the lanes, behind every car parked on the curb, behind every bush in the neighborhood. With every gaze my heart skipped a beat and i lost a minute of my life. Then out of the blue, I think i saw a bushy tail behind a car. I think i saw. Not sure. I started running towards it as soon as i got down from the bike. I screamed out Simba, Simba baby...and there he was......never before has he looked so handsome and beautiful at the same time. He still did not notice me. He was staring at the street dog standing right in front of him. As I called his name and slowed down my pace I heard my heart beat so loudly as if it would pop right out of my mouth.

He looked at me and froze for a millisecond. Suddenly i see him running and bouncing towards me with all his might. I have never seen him happier in life than that minute. There was my boy. My life support system. My son.
I managed to break into a smile as i hugged him hard and close to my heart with all my might. At least i found one. At least i have one.
It dawned upon me that Liz must be frightened too. Poor girl, she is only 4 months old. How could i do this? I have been such a terrible mother. Shame on you. You don’t deserve to have kids.
The search began again, only his time there was hope, a faint streak of hope. I was considering calling in a few more friends for the search operation. Also thinking bout lodging a complaint with the Local station and announcing a reward for the missing pup. Liz is cute. Cute is and understatement. She is pretty.....Nah..even that is too small a word for her. As all these thoughts kept racing in my head, Sarita screamed there she is.I saw her sitting on the porch , tied to a leash. Is it her? Why is she not recognizing me? She was sitting royally as if she has been sitting on a throne of soft silk. She looked contempt. As i walked towards her, she slowly rose and whined. Considering i have never given her a reason to whine till now let alone putting a leash on her collar. I got furious. They were a bunch of college going kids who found her on the road being chased by street dogs. I screamed at them, but realized that without them Liz would not have been safe. I apologized quickly. As she walked out of their house she started running towards my lane. She ducked and she jumped never losing her speed. It was difficult for me to keep pace. But i was happy seeing her run straight for the house. I found my girl too. By now the tears had dried on my face leaving dark black eye color running down till my chin.
I had my neighbors pouring in to see whether they both are fine and all i could say was that i am fine now. So this is how i found my kids- a 4 month old and the other a year old.My life, my reason to rush back home every single day of my life.


I love them more than anything, more than anybody.....

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| This angel fell @ 4:37 PM |

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